Most sane people have no problem saying “I don’t know”. It’s perfectly reasonable and acceptable to admit you don’t know something. For entrepreneurs like myself it becomes an existential statement. Let’s unpack it.

In The Beginning

Most entrepreneurs start out with a lot of unknown unknowns (thank you Donald Rumsfeld). When you start a business there are a ton of things you didn’t know that you don’t know. You are forced to learn a vast number of things, often by trial and error. I had some forethought to purchase a franchise when I started a business, so my learning curve was definitely accelerated. But in the end, there are things that are just not on your radar. For many business owners that includes: Hiring, Managing, Leading, Finances, Legal, Marketing, Strategic Thinking, Production. Actually, come to think of it, even with a franchise, I didn’t really understand anything about business when I started, and I was a CPA who is supposed to be educated on a lot of these things!

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But you figure them out, because you have to. When you are the business owner it is the ultimate “The Buck Stops Here” situation. No one is going to save you, and even worse, virtually no one cares whether you figure it out or not. Probably your banker (if they loaned you money) and certainly your immediate family (they want to eat and have a roof over their head). Other than that? “You’re on your own son” (thank you Mel Brooks/Blazing Saddles).

Stalled

So I, like most entrepreneurs, developed this attitude of “I don’t know, but I’ll figure it out.” And it works, until it doesn’t. For me it was with our marketing. I had been in charge of marketing by default, because no one else wanted it. After all, we were a bunch of accountants, and though extremely likeable folks, they were more than happy to let me handle that. And I tried, I really did. It’s not that I didn’t understand the principles of marketing. I had a clear target market, and I thought I understood their needs. I thought I understood the messaging to communicate, and I was aware of all of the traditional channels to communicate to them.

In the end, my efforts were not fruitful. Fortunately we had our worst year of marketing performance a couple of years ago. I say fortunately, because it was so catastrophically bad that I couldn’t ignore it. Marginal results would have allowed me to continue the illusion that I was the right person for the job.

But after holding on to the rope for over a year, I had to admit I was failing. That did not sit well with my ego. After all, I could look back at all of the success I had had in the business up to that point, and say “I can figure this out.” But I couldn’t.

Next Stage

So I decided to promote from within my marketing director to my leadership seat. She hadn’t figured it out either working with me, but I knew I definitely wasn’t the answer. I asked her if she wanted the job, and she enthusiastically said yes. I knew that she didn’t have the experience, but she shared the vision, and had the passion.

Problem solved, right? Not by a long shot. I knew she didn’t have the experience for the job, and we discussed it before hand, but I projected on her how I handle things. “Figure it out”. Looking back, there is so much I and the rest of the team could have done to support her to get her up to speed. Alas, no.

When she was struggling, I panicked, my ego kicked in, and I started to “get in her kitchen”. You know, put my hands back on the wheel. What happened? Anxiety, confusion, doubt. That’s what! I wasn’t helping, I was making it worse.

In the end, I had to remember that I didn’t have the answer. I don’t know! I had my shot at figuring it out, and I failed. Who was I to tell her how to cook? Fortunately, I realized that before I burnt her out. I realized that the best thing I could do was to her coach her to clarity. Help her crystalize what the problems she was attempting to solve. Then providing her the resources she needed to solve her own problem.

Lessons Learned

The frustrating thing about this, is that I knew most(all) of this going into it, and still stepped on my dick. Looking back, the over arching reason is fear. I was afraid that she was going to fail, and by proxy, we were going to fail as a company. When fear raises its ugly head, rational though goes out the window.

If you are not in tune with yourself, and know why you are acting the way you are, you’re likely to not see that you are acting out of fear. More likely, you will double down on your efforts. It is counterintuitive to let go of the rope, because holding on to the rope, figuring it out yourself, is what you did in the past with success.

When you are the leader of a company, you have to build the right team around you to solve the problems. That is not to say that you can’t contribute to solving the problems, after all, you have a unique perspective. But ultimately if the company is going to grow beyond you, the team has to solve the problems. And really, the right team, with your input, should be much better at solving problems than you by yourself.

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